"From 26 to 36"

First off, I want to apologize for the "spam" beneath my header.   I guess it speaks to the theme of this entry "nothing, ABSOLUTELY nothing, is perfect." Somethings are out of our control and that folks, that right there is the beauty of life! I found an immense peace of mind and piece of wisdom in accepting that. After I got over my initial "power trip" that is.

It's been a while...I've been transforming...shedding the ca-coon of 2012 and flying into 2013. 

This blog has been mostly dedicated to fashion, to some degree or another, but this year has opened my heart and mind. Beyond just the external layers of our complex being.

I'm beginning to realize (based on my own personal experiences, obstacles and challenges) that this world needs more positivity. 

So, I have taken the initiative to change the tone of my entries and use my words as a vector to reach out - to be a voice, to bridge whatever gap needs bridging, to restore hope and give people out there swimming in pools of pessimism a renewed sense of self and inner-projection. 

So much has happened in 2012 - the everlasting year, or so I like to call it. 

Marriages, births, deaths...sickness...change...sadness...

To some degree I just wish that I had the chance to say - "Thank You" or "I Wish I Knew" or simply "It Will Get Better."

                             _____

I turned 26 last month and I as many of us do at the dawn of a new year, I started my "bucket list of goals." Naturally, this list consisted of everything I failed to accomplished over the last 25 years. 

But waking up this year was different. I realized, on the actually day of my birthday, that for the FIRST time the pressure I've been putting on myself to be this perfect version of ME year after year after... - well that goal was not only self deprecating, but it was down right ridiculous!  

I've been inhibiting myself from living the life God intended for me to live. To be the person he intended me to be and fulfill the goals he intended me to fulfill.Because I wanted to be someone else.

Whatever you believe in or whomever you find solace in, or wherever you find a sense of clarity...well that "BEING" is more powerful than you and that being (in my opinion) is the ultimate. 

We small humans have the mere ability to see only a piece of the puzzle. A spec of the mural. A shade of the rainbow. And yet, we behave as if we have that ultimate power to change our pre-destined outcomes. Why is that? How dare we. Well, I won't speak for the world, but I will certainly say...how dare ME! 
                             ______

I was at the gym recently and I came across this article that inspired me to write a letter...to myself...my 36 year old self. At first the idea seemed somewhat silly - how am I supposed to know what will transpire in a DECADE? I struggle getting myself from breakfast to lunch, that's if I ever get there.

But then, in the split second of silence between songs, I thought "perhaps this exercise isn't about knowing everything, it's about accepting everything."

At 26, my life has been about rejection, self-rejection.I've challenged my gut, my family, my mentors, my health, my...well...everything. To no avail. Perhaps the purpose of this letter was to restore hope in myself. To reacquaint myself with the power of God, my ultimate. It was to help me fit into the shoes of a DREAMER. 

Though I'll never posses the power to see the "big" picture, I can dream about it, surely. 

                              _______

The beautiful thing about life, trenches and all, is that time is never stagnant. You can count on it - you will grow, time will tick, people will change - for better or for worse life progresses. Life matures.

And so, with that in mind, 26 year old Lizzy wrote to 36 year old Elizabeth with confidence pouring out of her fingertips. 

I said to myself, "I may not remember every single experience I lived 10 years from now, but I do know that every single experience I've lived made me the woman I KNOW I will be at 36. The mother, journalist, wife, sister, daughter and friend I strived to be." 

After sharing my letter with my parents, sister and boyfriend, I folded it and gave it to my father who preciously tucked it in the safe - postage stamp and all. "From Elizabeth", "To Elizabeth."

And That was That.

                              ______

The best part about writing that letter was knowing nothing lasts forever and appreciating it. I won't be 26 forever. I won't experience these very obstacles forever nor the these very joys.So I have better accept them. You have better accept them.

Before I knew it, 50 minutes on the elliptical flew by. And I was left with this thought....

There are so many chapters of my life ahead of me, ahead of all of us, and I can't wait to re-read this chapter of my life while living in a different chapter. 

"Overcoming obstacles is a matter of HEART over HARDSHIP."

Write a letter. Meet yourself 10 years down the road from now, I love that person. That person IS the product of a dream! 

A Quaint Reminder

WHAT A WORLD WIND!


I've decided it's time for me to bust open the door to this seemingly welded gilded cage and fly....to ARIZONA.


For those of you who've been keeping up with my recent posts, you're aware of my recent self-discovery which took place during my retreat to Tucson - sometimes retreats are necessary to remind yourself and the world what TRULY matters.


Health. Love. Happiness.


Those 30 days were some of the most revealing days of my life. Countless memorable moments, raw memories, ones that have motivated me to go back.


Since being back home I've digressed into some "old" habits - you know, the ones that convince you to listen to that critical inner voice telling you who you should be, what you should be and why you should be it? Yea, those toxic habits.


But, starting May 30th, I'm leaving those habits here. This camel has taken her last straw.


Fittingly, I ran across a "quaint" little reminder today, despite the fact that I found it on one of my notorious little gossip sites, the point is that somehow it reminded me of all those things I learned about myself while out there by myself. 


A quote, well an excerpt, from a documentary that Demi Moore produced called, "The Conversation." 


It's pretty powerful, the whole concept really. Initiating a global conversation about femininity and all it entails. Heavy stuff. 


As I looked within myself I found that this quote resonated with me so deeply, as an individual, but especially as a woman. Perhaps, it reminded me to reconsider the beauty within my vulnerability and the perfection within my imperfections:

courtesy of theybf.com

"...It’s like, we’re beautiful not because of what size we are, we’re beautiful because of how your mind works and you’re beautiful because you have this gorgeous heart and that comes from way more than you fitting in some size two dress. And we’re beautiful because of all these things that come up and tumble out of us and that’s beautiful because I just always feel like I love being a woman. I really love it...." -  A. Keys


However, if ever, you digest these words I urge you to let them marinate. Maybe a physical retreat isn't an option for you at the moment, but a mental retreat certainly always is. No matter the day, time, or space.


I'm curious to know where these words lead you on your rediscovery....


Bon Voyage!

I LOVE...ME?

The beauty of the female form always leaves me in awe. Now, I'll admit, I too, like most women, grapple with bouts of insecurity  issues now and then. Hey, I'm not proud, I'm human.

As I was getting ready to head out to the gym today I packed the usuals - mags, headphones, iphone, water...motivation...and I made my way!

The gym and I haven't always been "amigos". Let's just say, we went through a pretty severe break-up after years of what felt like an abusive relationship.

Essentially, I worked myself to the bone, literally.

As I sat on the bike, peddling away, I couldn't help but absorb everything around me. It's amazing what one notices when given the opportunity to...breathe.

The vast array of bodies, shapes, work outs, will power, drive, confidence, style - I was taken aback. I wasn't focused on myself, as per usual. Suddenly, I had this new-found appreciation for others.

It felt, well, refreshing!

Every time I go to the gym I find myself "nit-picking" - oh this is too flabby, this is too saggy, this could be tighter, this could look firmer. I can't recall ever having something positive to say about myself, not even "congrats for dragging your butt here!"

Sad, I know. 

As I looked around the gym I noticed that while every person in there was working...working hard...their faces didn't look miserable, they had "acceptance" written all over their faces. 

I had been reading the Spring Edition of InStyle while on the bike and suddenly this inherent pressure I felt to look like Jen Aniston on the cover faded.

A-C-C-E-P-T-A-N-C-E.

Such a profound concept. By definition, "to accept" means to "receive something or someone with favor or approval."

It's almost comical. The countless amount of times I've accepted others and yet refused to accept myself. From my body, to my smile, to my skin tone, to my hair...nothing was good enough.

For 10 years, I lived and breathed the impossibility  of perfection.

After leaving the gym, I ran across this picture on my girlfriend's Facebook page and it resonated with me.

There's something about the unique stance of each individual woman that radiates - acceptance.

"I AM WHO I AM, WHO ARE YOU?" 

The fact of the matter is -  a power greater than any single one of us made us who we are; well at least that's how I perceive things, that's when my ignorance isn't clouding my vision of course.

Having put that out there...I have a proposal.

For you readers out there I challenge you to answer these 3 questions.

1. What if, instead of waking up and critiquing what you see in the bathroom mirror, you dare yourself to ACCEPT what you see?

2. What if, you started the day off celebrating yourself instead of destroying yourself? 

3. When was the last time you said to yourself, "I LOVE YOU JUST AS YOU ARE?" How did you feel?

Just some "food for thought" the next time you pencil in a workout!

<3

"A Smile, Now That's Priceless..."

We all have good days. And then there are those notorious bad ones. The "I feel terrible from the inside out, I'll just wear my PJs around all day" kind of days.  

We've all been sucked into the slumps. Myself included. 

This past week I've worn my PJs around more than I'd like to count; but, this morning, well I decided to do something different. 

I tried, rather. 

I'm a firm believer in baby steps.I mean, why intentionally set yourself up for failure? The road to success isn't as seamless as a sprint to the finish line. Nor as instantaneous as the snap of a finger.

For those of you who doubt me, track your progress and then check back in about five years, are you there yet? Maybe...maybe not.

I woke up this morning after 3 successfully torturous nights of insomnia and felt...E.M.P.T.Y.

No energy, no feeling...nothing. My exhaustion finally caught up with me. Trying to put on "the face" wasn't even an option today.  

And yet, something changed. I changed.

Every morning I read inspirational quotes or articles; cliche I know, but hey sometimes it's the little things that make all the difference in the world...in the day...

This morning's came in the form of a poem. A poem that speaks truth in a melodic, yet profoundly vulnerable way.

A poem by an unknown author. 

An author who found power in the simple act of smiling.

For many people, smiles are pretty little facades. A "distraction" that sugar coats reality. 

Over the years, I've mastered the art of manipulating the innocence of my very own smile. I've gotten so good as to fool even myself into thinking that I'm truly happy. 

All the while, still in those infamous same pajamas.

Today, I managed to trade in the PJs for some workout clothes and I hit the gym...boy did it feel...GREAT!

I smiled from the second I committed to get outta bed, to the second I left the gym...and this time...I felt every muscle. It was a genuine act of gratitude.

For me, learning to believe in the power of smiling was enough to get me to smile. 

So, having shared my story,I too wanted to share my inspiration.  

The author may be unknown, but the content, well I believe it's known to us all.  

"A SMILE"

A smile costs nothing, but gives much-
It takes but a moment, but the memory of it usually lasts forever.
None are so rich that can get along without it-
And none are so poor but that can be made rich by it.

It enriches those who receive, without making poor those who give-
It creates sunshine in the home,
Fosters good will in business,
And is the best antidote for trouble-
And yet it cannot be begged, borrowed, or stolen, for it is of no value
Unless it is given away.

Some people are too busy to give you a smile-
Give them one of yours-
For the good Lord knows that no one needs a smile so badly
As he or she who has no more smiles left to give.

-Unknown

                May this change your tomorrow...xo.

'Tis The Season For...Pastels?

I spent a majority of the afternoon outside playing with my precious puppy, Halo Olivia.

My Darling Pup

Cutie that she is...that little white spot on her nose - gets me every time! 

But enough K-9 chitter chatter, back to the topic at hand...


S-P-R-I-N-G!


Buffalo is a true four seasons city; when it snows, boy does it S.N.O.W. But when the sun is shining, get those shades and smiles out...and SPF!

Playing in the sun all day just got me thinking...the colors of Spring are just to die for. There's something about the classy softness of pastels that I absolutely adore. 


Essie has an awesome Spring 2012 collection out right now, I was actually at Target earlier today and tested all the colors out (sssshhh, that'll just be our little secret, hehe).


I had a fav, the mint/light green. There's something about the way it complemented my skin that made me just have to buy it.


The beauty of living somewhere with four seasons is that one doesn't have to go far to find a color palette from which to draw inspiration. 


Open the window, walk down the street, breathe in the air and... 


WAH-LA. Suddenly, you know what color dress to wear.


Feeling the grass spread between my toes this afternoon really inspired my hue of choice...

Spring into Spring!

What'd ya'll think??? 


People always ask me, do your nails need to match your toes? Well, in my book, they do if your energy is consistent from head to toe. If not, why pretend? Mix it up!


Overall, I felt relaxed, cool, and calm all day...hence MINT!


What are your top 3 polishes for Spring 2012?

A "Fresh" Angle....

From it's initial inception, this blog has been a tribute to all those courageous people out there who dare to live their personal TRUTH day in and day out - 24/7, 365. 

Living out my personal truth hasn't always been easy. I liken the journey to that of a roller-coaster ride - a series of ups and downs. 

Perhaps at breakfast I enjoy my own company, but by lunch I'm ready for a change...sound familiar?

As I've gotten older I've realized that owning my truth has a lot to do with identifying and owning my character - my likes, dislikes, needs, wants, desires. 

       ... I wake up every morning to the same question...

 

"WHAT MAKES ME, ME?"

The avenue of FASHION is one phenomenally unique way of honing in on who you are and releasing your spirit in a dynamic, colorful and creative way.

Growing up I was never a follower. I wore whatever I wanted, whatever made me,me. 

Oh, the memories! 

"What is she wearing?" "Who does she think she is? Black and blue never went together?" "Is it Halloween?"

I embrace it all.

Years later, I have come to realize that while fashion is one avenue that helps us identify our own niche, a comfort zone of sorts, there are indeed a host of others. 

For example, what about nature? Think of the countless designers who've created billion dollar collections inspired by the world outside their windows.

I've come to realize over the past few months, while on hiatus, that perhaps I've bought into "my reflection" more than I've bought into my "self". 

"Not everything that glitters is gold, darling."

I spent a month in the desert...just me, mama nature, and those mountains...needless to say I brought nothing fabulous to wear but my smile. 

My Perspective

No heels, no glamour, no make-up...just me...a puritan.

 

And yet, as unfamiliar as it felt, I can truthfully say, I've never felt more at peace, more beautiful, more confidant, more sexy.

Who knew!  

I realized (perhaps later than sooner) that my "clothes" are only as beautiful and colorful and striking as I look and feel. I mean have you ever gone shopping when you feel like crap? 

I rather watch paint dry.Seriously. 

I chose to kick this new batch of entries off with a "fresh angle"; a new perspective on fashion, identity, beauty, self...

It's all about finding that sense of tranquility and belonging, that BALANCE.

And hey whether you find that in a brand spankin' new pair of J.Brands or in the mountains in Arizona, just appreciate that you found it. 

And remember, not even diamonds look like diamonds in their purest form.

Cheers to a different perspective <3.

The Older The Berry, The Sweeter The Wine"

BOY, HAVE I MISSED YOU ALL!!!

I'm SO sorry for my latest disappearing act, with Thanksgiving and all those family duties entail, I was forced to digress. The good news is....your girl is B.A.C.K! 

It's a NEW month and boy do I have oh so much to share!


But before we delve "knee deep" into the heavenly cloud that is gossip and fashion, I truly hope you all had a WONDERFUL Thanksgiving. It's always nice to be surrounded by the ones you love, whereever they may be <3.


With my birthday steadily approaching (I'll be turning 25 (or 30 as I call it, haha) on January 21st) I've indirectly been paying attention to what the "more experienced" ladies in hollywood have going on - from head to toe.

While they might be older, looks certainly are deceiving, these fashionistas CERTAINLY have it going on. Most, if not all, of these women look even better today than they did in their prime 20s. Dare I go out on a limb in saying that, but hell, if someone told me that I looked better at 30 then I do today, I would jump up and down for joy.

TAKE THAT GRAVITY!

It's hard these days to tell who is who and how old she really is. Between the wardrobe, lights, cameras, and make-up it's all a mystery to me.

Oh, and let's not forget the ultimate game changer, A KILLER TEAM!

Earlier today, I saw this picture of Gabby Union, one of my favs, and drooled. 


theybf.com

I mean the woman is in her late 30s - the skin? Flawless. The hair? Glistening and flowy from root to tip. The mani/pedi? Perfectly shaded. And my favorite part? The risk! Who said you can't trade in the "LBD" in for a hot pink number?

This woman made me feel refreshed and relaxed about turning the big 2-5. Maybe this is year's "my" year?

(Dating a younger man doesn't hurt either, *cough cough*)

I digress (again).

This society can be so frustrating at times. Women in the media face such pressure to look a certain way, regardless of how they feel where they are. How can a 40 year old look like a 20 year old? That's impossible.

And that's when my dear friend Eva hit me with this oh so potent dose of reality, "Liz, anyone can look that damn good when you got the money and the tools. Please, if I had those things at my disposal I could look like Gabby and more."

REMINDER LADIES - DON'T JUDGE YOUR OUTTER BEAUTY ON A PICTURE LIKE THIS - IT'S DECEIVING.

I think the smile on Gabby's face is the one sincere indicator that happiness really has to do with what's going on within - a good career, good family, love, and learning to embrace age.

You are who you are, why fight it?

I'll admitt, I was jealous when I saw this picture. I mean the woman looks GREAT. But in retrospect, the important thing to remember is that all you have to do is live a healthy life, consistently.

I know that it's unrealistic to think that on January 21st I'll suddenly wake up 2 sizes smaller with 10x more energy than the day before. 

Unlikely.

So why not start on that goal TODAY. After all I'm still 24 for a little over a month, I got time on my side!

If I've learned anything from women like: Demi Moore, Gabby Union, Elle Macpherson, Heidi Klum, Beyonce, and Christie Brinkley (absolutely fabulous, take a look), just to name a few.

Its this: LOOKING GREAT AS YOU GET OLDER HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH MAGIC AND EVERYTHING TO DO WITH MAINTENCE!

- Exercise

- Eat healthier

- Practice natural practices

- Live happily

Anyways, I just wanted to write to all my ladies out there, young and slightly more mature, and share my thoughts on Hollywood's portrayal of women, well in general.  

What do you think?? Is the lime-light spread fairly across the red carpet?

Cheers!

xoxo